It can truly test your patience and your creativity to find something to keep small children amused while you’re working from home and you need to concentrate on a project—and with no sitter. There were many times when my partner was working out of town and I had four children under seven to keep occupied while I had to meet professional deadlines.
KIDS WILL BE KIDS
When children can’t leave you alone, the first thing to remember is to stay calm and realize that they are just being who they are—kids. They have no idea that you are under pressure to produce a project or meet a deadline, and they don't understand how they can help you. Even when you say, “Mommy has to work so you have to be quiet,” and they nod at you, they don’t understand the abstract concept of “leave me alone.” Their world is about their needs and they don’t have the cognitive ability to understand that other people have needs too that are equally compelling. From ages 6–12, the growing awareness of other people in their life (and their interests) increases. That’s why children go to school after age six—because they are more equipped to understand how the larger world works and how to get along with others by putting their own needs aside for a time.
In addition, kids under the age of seven do not understand parcels of time. They mean nothing to young children, so when we say “10 minutes,” they have no idea how long that might be. With that in mind, you have to keep an eye on them to keep them safe and fed, and find non-messy activities for them to do.
Children under the age of three have very little self-control when big feelings of frustration erupt; they gain that self-control through their growing executive function as they get older. In the meantime, they may want something badly and lose control of their emotions when an obstacle is in their path. It’s the prime age for temper tantrums brought on by anger and frustration, and it’s perfectly normal. But when you have to get work done, you’ll want to try and avoid tantrums by meeting children’s needs, so you can meet yours.
TIPS FOR GETTING WORK DONE
- When you have exhausted Netflix, stock up on DVDs from the library or borrow from friends. Don’t worry about the amount of screen time the kids are consuming because this is when it’s needed.
- Pack away excess birthday and holiday gifts when received (without the children noticing), and pull them out when you need to work.
- Store half their toys in boxes or buckets, and rotate them. Pack away old toys and pull out a new bucket when you need some time. Although the toys are used to you, they’ll be “new” to young children under age five if they haven’t seen them for a month.
- Arrange a play date at someone else's house. Be a good friend and reciprocate when they need time too.
- Join a babysitting co-op or hire a homeschooling teen to come over and play with your children.
- Wait until naptime. Put a fan near their door; the white noise will keep them asleep longer.
- Send your partner out with the children with spare clothes and lots of snacks. You will text them when you are done and they can come back. My partner used to ride the metro because the kids loved the trains.
- Bring out craft materials. Be sure to display things that don’t create too much mess. Now is not the time for painting, which needs close supervision. Playdough is open-ended and less messy.
- Buy passes to the local zoo, science centre, museum, and play places where the children can run free. Plop yourself in the adult sitting area and bring along your work while keeping an eye on them. They are contained and safe and having fun.
- Make sensory bins that are not too messy. Rice and lentils make good “indoor sandboxes.”
- For older children, signal to them you are working, even when you are sitting at the kitchen table, by wearing a red or green hat. A red hat means not to interrupt you unless there is blood or fire. A green hat signals to the child that you are available, but they should try to figure it out on their own first.
- Set the clock an hour ahead and put the kids to bed an hour earlier.
- Let the kids stay up late to watch movies on the condition they let you get some work done. The minute they interrupt you, the movie goes off and they go to bed. Give two warnings and then do it.
- The most important tip is to spend some quality time with the children first. Read a story for 15 minutes and have some cuddle time together. Children who are “attention-full” will be able to play alone more easily.
If after all this, it’s still impossible to work with children underfoot—and sometimes it is—relax and admit defeat. Children are only young once, so enjoy the time you have with them.
